Violet: Oh, Mr. Jordan has lost his mind. Dwayne: I actually don’t know what else to, I don’t know anything else about them other than that. Listen to me! Donnie Azoff: F**king chill! Enough, enough. Bottom line. That’s f**king exactly what we want you to do, to rat. Naomi Lapaglia: Baby, we got to get to London. Donnie Azoff: Okay. Jordan Belfort: Ten! Mark Hanna: Hey, f**k him. But it says here, this guy will show his c**k. Yeah, instead of growing up. Oh, my God! Then share our website on Social Media. He’s smart, you’re dumb. Naomi Lapaglia: I’m really happy for you. Robbie Feinberg: Captain who? [the captain of the yacht walks onto the deck] No? Naomi Lapaglia: No, you didn’t research the whole thing and deal with the f**king golf course people! Jordan Belfort: Just listen to me. Naomi Lapaglia: No! Jordan Belfort: [voice over] Say what you will, but the Duchess did have style. Brad: You’ll give me a call? My friend’s in Long Island, he told me he got picked up in some f**king shopping mall. [Jordan chuckles] She cuts hair. [Donnie goes below deck and gets the ludes; up in the bridge as he looks at the giant wave] [Donnie tries to grab the microphone from Max] Lucas Solomon: A wire. Donnie Azoff: And by the way, I haven’t got an apology yet for that. My friend’s in Long Island, he told me he got picked up in some f**king shopping mall. [he laughs] Jordan Belfort: Ow! Mark Hanna: Pop off to the bathroom, work one out anytime you can. Did you just say “wear a wire”? Oh! Jordan Belfort: Yeah. They’re so beautiful. That guy, Denham, that FBI agent guy, somebody told me he’s got your phones tapped. Jordan Belfort: I’m going to f**king break your face. Naomi Lapaglia: Wave to Daddy! [he slurs the words out again] [Hector chuckles and gives them the menus] Assuming the account is under your name. Good, pick up the phone and start dialing! It had nothing to f**king do with me. [to the women] [in their bedroom as Naomi is getting undressed] And the stock goes down… Jordan Belfort: [voice over] The first name on the list was Donnie. Just shut the f**k up. It’s a little uncomfortable. Sea Otter: And I’m not going to get there by being wrong, Stanley. What does an intern make in a deal like that? [Denham runs towards the camera putting his hand up against it] Stop that, sweetie. I swear to God, I will f**king kill you! Naomi Lapaglia: I f**king hate you, Jordan. [the knock their pills together before popping them; a little later we see them sitting on the couch watching “Family Matters” on TV] Rochelle Applebaum: Hm. Jordan Belfort: Bye-bye. Donnie Azoff: Look, man, a lot can happen to having a kid, or whatever, takes risk whether you’re f**king cousins or not. Hector: Mr. Hanna, what can I bring for you on this glorious afternoon? Look at where the stock’s at today, huh? Straight Line Testimonial #2: Think about it for a second. She just doesn’t, you know what I’m saying? Donnie Azoff: That’s a nice ride. Toby Welch: I’m going to drop you, you f**king! Jordan Belfort: [voice over] Get off the phone, get off the f**king phone, idiot! [later Jordan hears his name being called] Okay? I got to, I got to tell you this. Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan? Jordan Belfort: Twenty thousand dollars was stolen from my f**king sock drawer! [Jordan and Donnie start laughing and just then they arrive at the Swiss bank] [to Hughes] Max Belfort: Jordan, What do you have to think about? Naomi Lapaglia: Fine. Broker #1: I think you’re making a big mistake. Aunt Emma: Stability, dear. [Denham and Hughes start to leave] Jordan Belfort: Move my a**! Welcome. [we see FBI Agent Patrick Denham arriving at work and continuing his investigation of Stratton, Jordan and the other brokers, we then see Jordan sat at his desk talking directly to the camera] Naomi Lapaglia: When I talked to her she was fine. It’s a woozie. And welcome to Stratton Oakmont. The Wolf of Wall Street Screenplay » Jean Jacques Saurel: Ooph. Jordan Belfort: The same gentlemen that told me that you tried to get your brokers license also told me that you were a straight arrow. [as he starts snorting the coke Naomi walks into the room] Very fast. Aunt Emma: To release the tension? Teresa Petrillo: Why not? [blood starts pouring down Jordan’s forehead] Aunt Emma: Welcome. Mommy is just sick and tired of wearing panties.” – Jordan Belfort, 39:) “I’m not fucking leaving! Jean Jacques Saurel: It is terrible to you. Take for example, I got this one kid, right? It is no matter. Jordan Belfort: One hit. Brookville Police Officer #1: Come on, let’s go. Jordan Belfort: Alright. Jordan Belfort: The expensive champagne and the wine. [she sees Donnie is turning blue] Go ahead. Four hundred and f**king thirty thousand f**king dollars in one f**king month! Jordan Belfort: [voice over] Wouldn’t you like to learn how to sell it? Brookville Police Officer #1: Let’s go. Jordan Belfort: Well, I’m sorry to hear that, buddy. Jordan Belfort: Take it easy, Kev. But for the life of me I can’t figure it out why. Donnie Azoff: They’re up my a**, don’t worry about it. Jordan Belfort: And to celebrate with our weekly act of debauchery, I have offered our lovely sales assistant, Danielle Harrison here, ten thousand dollars to shave her f**king head! Let’s f**k! Naomi Lapaglia: That was the last time. [first lines; we see a conservative TV commercial for Stratton Oakmont, Inc. showing a lion walking through one of the floor of the company] Naomi Lapaglia: Aunt Emma is dead. [the brokers go crazy cheering and clapping]. I got it, I got it. Naomi Lapaglia: Okay. [Jordan then walks to the living room, falls on the couch and passes out]. Jordan Belfort: The only problem you’re going to have is that you didn’t buy more. And I choose rich every fucking time. Agent Patrick Denham: I don’t see why a little sit-down like this… [his broker friends laugh]. Jordan Belfort: This stuff, sh*t about you and your cousin or something like that. “Fugayzi, fugazi. Jordan Belfort: Right, exactly. Robbie Feinberg: Yeah, you should f**king toss him. Jordan Belfort: Look, my point is that I know you’re investigating Stratton. Jordan Belfort: Why? Massive heart attack at thirty-five, same age Mozart died. Jordan Belfort: If you get in to any trouble whatsoever, I’ll come forth immediately, I’ll say that I duped you. Pick up the phone and start dialing! Downstairs. You never did anything wrong in the first place, right? Yes! Huh? Jordan Belfort: Hm. [looking at the captain] With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Fugazi Wolf Of Wall Street animated GIFs to your conversations. [Jordan chuckles] You don’t know me, I don’t know you. You built it, so now preserve it! Donnie Azoff: Come do it for me. [Donnie then grabs Nicky’s wig and tries to pull it off] Naomi Lapaglia: Well, we can stay for a drink. [he shakes hands with Jordan] 31:) “You don’t choose who you fall in love with, do you? Jordan Belfort: Hey, Bo. Naomi Lapaglia: It was a surprise, I didn’t even know. Aah! Don’t forget to bookmark our website and subscribe to our YouTube channel for future Quotes Update for Free. [back at home, Jordan has sex with Naomi on their bed which is covered in cash] Jordan Belfort: We’re going on a little trip, honey. I mean, I had skipped the tingle phase and went straight to the drool phase. Jordan Belfort: Oh! [he’s clearly unable to stand] You know what I mean? It’s a complete list of every person that was at my wedding. Toby Welch: No. I’m not leaving. I called the Justice Department, the DEA, nobody even knows you f**king exist, so calm down. Donnie Azoff: I’m no scientist, I don’t know what the f**k you’re talking about. But a U.S. rathole would never get into Switzerland with all that money. Jordan Belfort: Get him off the phone! It’s never landed. Jordan Belfort: What is it? Least of all, stockbrokers, right?” [Jordan and Donnie or on Jordan’s yacht] Your aunt was such an elegant, attractive woman. Jordan Belfort: I take Quaaludes, ten to fifteen times a day, for my “back pain”. [Bo rolls his eyes in frustration] f**k you… Attorneys] Jordan Belfort: Well sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t. Okay, if I can’t do that, can I just, can I give the guy a call? I got it. Wow! Jordan Belfort: Captain Ted! One count engaging in conspiracy to commit money laundering. Am I crazy? Come here, baby. Jean Jacques Saurel: [voice over] Yes. Happing hunting. f**king cheap f**ks. Mmm. You’re under arrest! Jordan Belfort: F**king bullsh*t. I’m not allowed to call him? Oh, you can play rough, huh? Jordan Belfort: I really appreciate your help. That’s incredible, sir. Mark Hanna: We don’t give two sh*ts about how technology works, because all we care about is getting f**king rich! You’re not f**king taking my children, you vicious f**king c**t! [Jordan walks out onto the office floor where the rest of the brokers are, they all cheer him as he walks through them and takes front stage to stand in front of a microphone] I’m making an honest living, you motherf**ker! Jordan Belfort: Right, who f**king wouldn’t? Jordan Belfort: Hm. Jordan! [the brokers clap] Jordan Belfort: Listen to me… But I had to take them just right. Donnie Azoff: I can’t go down there, Jordan. [walking up to Jordan who’s sat by the pool drinking beer] Jordan Belfort: For the nerves! [the whole office explodes with applause and cheers then the marching band enters the office wearing only hats and underwear, then champagne is brought in for everyone] Close it! Stewardess #2: We cannot take off if you haven’t fastened your seatbelt. Jordan Belfort: Unless of course it was an investigation into stock fraud, which is a crime here in Switzerland, if I’m correct. Friends, enemies, business associates. Dwayne: You know they’re just a couple of brothers that are making radar detectors out of their garage. Jordan Belfort: Dad, he said T and A. [he pulls up outsider her apartment and they sit in awkward silence for a moment] [Jordan crawls out of the country club and makes it to the front steps, he stares at the steps for a moment before attempting to crawl down them but can’t make it] [that night the yacht is caught in the middle of a storm] Jordan Belfort: Yeah. [Jordan and Aunt Emma walk in the as he explains to her what her wants from her] Agent Patrick Denham: Um… Donnie Azoff: What are you drinking? Holy sh*t. Donnie Azoff: I check my f**king messages everyday when I come home from work. [they stare at each other for a moment]. Jordan Belfort: You’ve never been on a jet-ski? We called him Mad Max because of his hair trigger temper, which could be set off by something as innocuous as a ringing telephone. Donnie Azoff: Hey, Rugrat. Naomi Lapaglia: You’re a father now. Naomi Lapaglia: Mm-hmm. Oh, and the drugs. [to Donnie] Jordan Belfort: Who? Housekeeper: Wait a minute. [Jordan drinks from his glass of water as Hanna drinks his martini] Violet: What’s the matter with you? Jordan Belfort: Fantastic. Jordan Belfort: What the f**k is that supposed to mean? Mr. Belfort has helped the government win convictions of over two dozen serious offenders and helped them recover millions of dollars to be made available for restitution to their victims. Brad: Get the f**k out of here. Aunt Emma: Sometimes I wonder if you let money get the best of you, my love. Jordan Belfort: That’s the one thing about Wall Street and this market is, for me, I feel it’s good to give back, you know? Nicky Koskoff: Jordy, come on talk to me, man. Stewardess #2: Please, sit down. Jordan Belfort: I’m fine. Stay where you are! When I riding home on the subway, and my balls are f**king sweating and I’m wearing the same suit three days in a row, yeah, you bet I do. Agent Patrick Denham: Yes, we want you to rat. Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah. We’re going to go upstairs, alright? Steve. Donnie Azoff: No, they’re not retarded or anything like that. Naomi Lapaglia: Mm-hmm. She was a single mom on the balls of her a** with an eight year old son. Wolfie! How’s she doing? Jordan Belfort: Come on, don’t be shy. Jordan Belfort: Cheers. Like my Pops, Mad Max, had said, “The chickens had come home to roost.” Whatever the f**k that means. Brookville Police Officer #1: Mr. Belfort? Jordan Belfort: Exactly. Jordan Belfort: [voice over] After fifteen years in storage, the Lemmons had developed a delayed fuse. Jordan Belfort: That’s what you f**king do! Donnie Azoff: Later! What floor are you on? Jordan Belfort: F**k you! It’s a woozie. Cheerio. You want to f**k me? Mr. Belfort has helped the government win convictions of over two dozen serious offenders and helped them recover millions of dollars to be made available for restitution to their victims. Jordan Belfort: Hey, uh, I’m looking for an Investor’s Center? Robbie Feinberg: Get your f**king hands off me! How are you doing today? Jordan Belfort: You know what? [as he starts snorting the coke Naomi walks into the room]. [Jordan laughs harder] You’re a f**king pill deal! You show me a pay stub for seventy-two thousand dollars and I’ll quit my job right now and I work for you. Agent Patrick Denham: Hey, Jordan, let me give you a little legal advice. I got you. Jordan Belfort: Let me introduce you. It’s a one way street, whichever way I go. Jordan Belfort: You look so beautiful, baby. Yeah, no, I’m serious too. Robbie Feinberg: Texas Instruments at eleven and took you out at forty-seven… [Jordan manages to crawl over to get a box out of one of the kitchen drawers] [the hostess nods her heads and walks off] Robbie Feinberg: Oh, my God. Jordan Belfort: Just relax, sweetheart. What did you take? Donnie Azoff: When did I say that? Jordan Belfort: Hey, fellas! [we see in a conference room as Solomon reads from their contract] Jordan Belfort: Captain Ted! Sea Otter: Thank you very much for that. [shouting into the radio] I really have to give this some thought and, uh, talk to my wife about it. Jordan Belfort: [voice over] Okay, walking’s out. [to Steve as the brokers cheer and clap] No. [Brad drops the case and puts his hands up] Jordan Belfort: Yeah. Jean Jacques Saurel: Yeah. I’d seen jello move faster. [Denham shakes his hand] [they shake hands] Jordan Belfort: It’s alright, baby. The point is, it doesn’t matter what the f**k they say. [he pulls back and nods his head] Who’s f**king teeth are you going to mash in?! Also if you like our efforts and love. It’s that slipped disc thing again. Agent Patrick Denham: Good for you, little man. Naomi Lapaglia: No! I boarded the plane just before midnight. Agent Patrick Denham: Well, I, Jordan, I can’t discuss an ongoing investigation. I’m a mutt. [there’s cheering and applause from the brokers] [to Max] Jordan Belfort: I will. But rich people don’t buy penny stocks, they just don’t. Jordan Belfort: Steve here yet? Brad: Oh, f**ksville, huh? Plot – Jordan Belfort earns by day thousands of dollars per minute, money that he squanders by night at the same velocity in drugs, sex and travels around the world. Jordan Belfort: Is that right? Donnie Azoff: I love it. You know I’d do it for you, right? [as Jordan extends his finger to touch Rocky, the Rocky yaps at him] Jordan Belfort: Hello, my name is Jordan Belfort. We require immediate assistance! Jordan Belfort: F**king sucks. Donnie Azoff: Hey, what are the citizens of f**ksville doing today when their Emperor’s gone? I’m going to have Heidi lick some caviar off my balls in the meantime. [Brad drops the case and puts his hands up] You’re never going to see the kids again! Jordan Belfort: No sh*t? Teresa Petrillo: What’s that say? Jean Jacques Saurel: Bouge ton cul! Okay? [as Jordan continues to try and get Donnie off the phone] [as they watch Jordan crash the car into the pillar] Jordan Belfort: Oh! Donnie Azoff: Aah! [they both laugh] Max Belfort: What do you think? [she pushes Donnie back into his seat] Jordan Belfort: Ca depend? Max Belfort: T and E. T and E. Whoever gets closer to the dollar sign gets the most points. Honorary Raymond Samitz: The sentence of the court shall be 36 months in federal prison. I want a divorce. Chester Ming: I’m sorry, I don’t recall that company. Do you guys have any milk? Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah. If you don’t have the guts to attend Jordan Belfort’s Straight Line Persuasion System seminar, then how do you expect Jordan Belfort: Xanax to take the edge off pot to mellow me out, cocaine to wake me back up again, and morphine, well, because it’s awesome. [Jordan stares at him] Donnie Azoff: Can you believe it? [Jordan and Aunt Emma walk in the as he explains to her what her wants from her] Bo Dietl: Listen to me… [she tries to wake Jordan, who’s lying on the kitchen floor] Robbie Feinberg: I don’t think he’s going to get hurt, they’re like, they got like super human strength. Donnie Azoff: I don’t want to die, Jordan! Beni-f**king-hana! Steve Madden: Hello. Technically, you do work for me.” – Jordan Belfort, 46:) “But what was wrong with that? [Donnie laughs still holding the phone] Honey! [to Manny] [Jordan quickly sits down] Jean Jacques Saurel: Yeah. Say that again! Dwayne: And I hope it happens. Agent Patrick Denham: Just say the same. Show them the shoes. It’s pretty cool. Seriously, how much money do you make? I mean, if we, if we take it slow. [Jordan is on top of Naomi having sex with Naomi who clearly does not want to] This right here is the land of opportunity. [to Nicky] Jordan. Violet: I got it! Jordan Belfort: Oh, Jesus. We can f**king handle chop, right? We figured we were safer working from overseas, giving orders to Rugrat. Jordan Belfort: Oh my, God! [Donnie and Jordan start laughing] Jordan Belfort: [voice over] Because they’re too smart, that’s why not. [next we see a large house] Is that it? Max Belfort: Righto, Jean. I’m on the phone! Jordan Belfort: So boring, I want to kill myself. [they shake hands] Naomi Lapaglia: Jesus Christ, Jordan! [shows Denham a sheet of paper] Jordan Belfort: According to U.S. criminal code, there needs to be an exact dollar figure for the exchange of services. Donnie Azoff: Neither do I, let’s f**king go. Now? [in the lobby of the bank they are met by Jean Jacques Saurel] Stupid. f**king relax! Good! [after Jordan finishes having sex with Naomi he puts on arm across her body] [the closing market bell rings and the whole office cheers], [after the market bell rings Jordan addresses his brokers standing at front speaking into the microphone] Naomi Lapaglia: Jordan, he’s not breathing, you got to do something! Stewardess #2: Okay, go back to your seat, please. I’m going to take custody of the kids. Jordan Belfort: She did?! Pick up the phone and start dialing! [at the wedding reception, Jordan and Naomi dance] Brad: I’ve heard enough, please. No matter who you are, no matter where you came from, you too can become financially independent in just a matter of months. [suddenly Jordan looks up as if he’s heard something, but there’s no one there] Heidi: It’s a pleasure. Jordan Belfort: You know, five years ago when I started Stratton Oakmont with Donnie Azoff, I knew the day would eventually come where I’d have to be moving on. I mean I could take you step by step through what exactly is occurring, you know? Jordan Belfort: Hi, Blair. Violet: Mr. Jordan, you got a visitor. Jordan Belfort: Why? Just tell her I’ll be out in a couple of minutes.